Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Jacked by a woman at the yard sale

So, we had a yard sale this weekend to get rid of 9 years of clutter. I am a very organized person, but I still had LOTS of stuff that needed to go.

So, I posted on my facebook yard sale site that I was having a moving sale, and began digging out crap to sell. I also said there were no prices. Because ain't nobody moving in a week got time to price 548696 items.

So, mom and sis were here, we were setting up and the sale started. It was a little painful for me to sell things for like 2$ (ie a rug, clothing, dishes, etc) but I let it go. Things were moving right along. Sidenote: some people do not like to bargain. If they ask how much, I say an amount, they will just put it down instead of asking me for another price.)

We had an oven from our kitchen out there, because the broiler went out right after we put our house went on the market. "Someone" decided we could probably sell it, so we drug it out and had some interested people, but they either couldn't fix the broiler, or they didn't have a way to tote it home.

Well here comes this old lady. She is bee-lining to the oven. She's like, "How much?" I said, "$10??" She goes, "How about it's free, because I don't know if it really works, and if it doesn't I can just throw it away." I'm standing there like whaaaaaa? Then I figured it was better to let her take it then for me to have to figure out how to get rid of it. Cause it doesn't exactly fit in the trash. So I tell her fine, take it. She's like, "Can you put it in my car full of junk?" Ummmmmm....

So my sister and I get a dolly and finagle this giant oven into her Jeep Cherokee. Whereupon I find a pair of my LL Bean flipflops in the back. Seriously? She was trying to jack my flops and get a free oven? I'm like, "I'll make you a pile over here for the other things." She continues to poke around and ask if our lawnmower is for sale and if we have any furniture for sale.

Finally, she gets to her pile and asks how much. She had: flipflops, a clock, a ceramic hot chocolate thing, and something else. I tell her $5. She literally says to me, "How about $1?" I'm dumbfounded because I've just been out cheaped by an elderly woman. By the time I gather myself, she has her pile and is bookin it out of there.

My sister and I sat there and died laughing for a good 5 minutes. Then she came back. Because she left the box of burners and drip pans in the driveway.

And lest you think this story is over, it is not. That afternoon, probably about 2 hours after she left, she CAME BACK because she was missing a piece to the oven. I looked all over the garage for it, couldn't find it, said sorry, but it was free. She wouldn't let it go. I had to go get Jason. She said for him to come get it!! He was like, "Sorry, you be crazy. It was a free oven. It's yours. I'm not coming to pick it up." I literally was DYING. She made me take her number down in case we found the part while packing the garage.

The rest of the weekend, I would look at Sarah and say, "I can't even believe what just happened." And we would just crack up all over again. And we woke up on Sunday expecting to see an oven sitting in our driveway.

Moral: watch it at the yard sales, those older woman will work you over.


  1. I can't even. I am dying. You need a disclaimer that says Don't read this at work! Hahaha what a crazy biotch!

  2. This is a true story for sure! I was there! Also the Tickle Me Book lady! She was real and livid because she didn't want to drive three miles to get this damn book and saw that Susannah offered it to somebody else! "Oh no you don't" she screamed (texting on the phone)! This went on for about an hour and she finally said she would block Susannah from her future sales!!!!!!!!! HAHAHA! Only thing she got right all night!!

  3. This is the best blog post I've read in weeks!


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